The science of God

I have never doubted the existence of God. But being a physics graduate and a firm believer in the theory of evolution, I need some rational and proof to believe in most things. Life for that matter, I firmly believe is not the ‘Lego table’ of our God where he experimented with different shapes to come up with the world as we know it now. But some things make you look beyond these realms of proof and debate the unknown. The balance that exists in nature. Earth being at the right distance from the sun, being of the exact size that created just enough magnetic field to hold an atmosphere just to the right extent, enabling the formation of water, gases and elements, just enough to create life. By way of mathematics, its probable that this same measures exists elsewhere too, but I never did too well in mathematics anyway and this blows my mind! This balance, I believe, is the science of God.

Waking up in the morning...

A cliff. 30 feet below is the lashing sea foaming up against the rocks. I stretched out, with my arms towards the sky and almost on my toes. The breeze is so strong, that I can feel my short hair also flutter. The breeze seems to be a little wet, probably the wetness still lingering from the downpour of last night.

The muffled barking of my dogs echo through the garden. I was so lost in the orange tinge of the sky this morning; I forgot to get them into the living area from the outpost they guard through the night. They would be clinging onto the door wondering why their master has not let them in yet. Their barking is growing louder as I rushed towards them… no echo anymore.

As soon as I opened the door, the two 6 year old Labradors rushed in, not giving me a glimpse but rushing to their favorite spot where their mom would spread out their breakfast. She never misses to keep the cleaned up bowls full with their favorite dog bites and bones. Their love would be showered upon me after their tummy is filled I am sure. I picked up the news paper tucked neatly into the pipe holder and took a deep breath in. filled my lungs in with the fresh smell of wet mud and new sprout leaves. The birds were getting noisier.

I walked towards the small white iron chairs and the little table. I was looking forward for that tea, the rains last night has dampened everything around including my spirit and it needed some warming up. As I crossed over from the walk way to the lawn, I could feel the wetness of the grass all over my feel. I stepped out of my shoe and walked barefoot on the lawn, soft, wet under the feet, and the tiny droplets falling over from the longer grass around my feet.

The white curtain was occasionally peeping through the black wrought iron window grills. I could catch a glimpse of her sitting at the table near the window, getting ready for the walk to the beach below. The smudged yellow walls were wet still and looked darker and brighter. The thick bamboos were almost making music swinging in the strong breeze currents. And the waves slapping across the rocks below seemed to be part of the symphony, synching in too well…

I sipped the tea and it was bliss. I savored the taste and leaned back on my chair. The leaves were freshly plucked, maybe couple of weeks back from the nearby farm and promptly delivered by the loving neighbor. I could hear the clicker of the bowls, I guess the dogs are done with their eating and would be ready for their walk to the beach below. I should get ready.

I should wake up now.

Head and shoulder above the rest

I hear that one major business school sent an elite team to the Taj hotel in Mumbai of 26/11 terrorist attack. They were on a mission to understand, how a month old trainee in the banquette hall decided that I will wait in the hotel until all guests are safely escorted out. How did hundreds of employees put their lives in the line of fire to serve their guests, help their guests, when they were well versed with the escape routes themselves? What gave a senior employee the strength to stand by, help other employees in cleaning up the mess, knowing he had just lost his family at the hands of the very same terrorist?

I don’t know what the findings of their study are. But I think, if you are living in India, you probably know why. There are some values that TATAs stand for, which keeps them head and shoulder above the rest.

Post the 26/11 episode, there were some steps that the TATAs took, which is not known to a lot of us. Even if you are aware, reading this again will only fill you with pride that we have an organization, a head of an organization who behaves in such fashion.

When an organization which has been struck by such a devastating occurrence, some desperate measures are sure to take place. TATAs have done a whole lot for the employees and that is understandable and probably expected from a TATA company. Things like full last salary for life for the family and dependents. Complete responsibility of education of children and dependents - anywhere in the world, full Medical facility for the whole family and dependents for rest of their life, all loans and advances were waived off - irrespective of the amount, counselor for life for each person were some of the many steps taken.

They did not stop with this. In a record time of 20 days, a new trust was created by the TATAs for the purpose of relief of employees. What is unique is that even the other people, the railway employees, the police staff, the pedestrians who had nothing to do with TATAs were covered by compensation. Each one of them was provided subsistence allowance of Rs. 10K per month for all these people for 6 months. New hand carts were provided to several vendors who lost their carts. Tata will take responsibility of life education of 46 children of the victims of the terror.

A 4 year old girl, granddaughter of a vendor at a station, had 4 bullets in her when she was brought to the Government hospital. The doctors were able to remove only one bullet and she was battling for her life. She was taken to Bombay hospital and several lacs were spent by the TATAs on her, until she fully recovered. I am sure this is one of the many stories that have never been discussed in television shows, as it lacks ‘sensationalism factor’.

It’s said, that the Group HR head went with a pretty beefed up budget for the plans laid out wondering if the chairman would approve of such a huge cost outflow. The chairman remarked – do you think we are doing enough? When crores are being spent on rebuilding our hotel to make it ready for business, why can’t we spent an equal amount to ensure we support as many people within and outside our family to get back on their feet, after what has hit us.

Time in and time out, it’s been the TATAs who have come to the fore front and done a difference to a situation of misery. And they do it without anyone knowing. There is no PR team which trumpets on what is done.

One of the most important leadership traits is the ability to create people who think like you, who behave like you, whose values are your own. When you have an organization which can empathize and have a deep sense of helping, it’s any ones guess what a month old trainee would do when thrown into a situation like that.

The circus called India

There has been an unprecedented situation in India during the last fortnight or so. I am confused and I am sure most of us are.

There is a 73 year old man, who has spent a large part of his life for helping others in the midst of a battle with the government and largely succeeding in embarrassing them day after day. Is he right or wrong? I don’t know.

There is a 73 year old man who is fasting from last 10 days to ensure there is a strong law against corruption in India. 10 days of no food! There are thousands of people who are coming out in his support and I am sure the weekend may see a lot more support as it does not inconvenience anyone too much.

There are a lot of people who are taking mileage out of it. Political statements, asking for resignations, mud-slinging, dramatic news reports, corporate sponsorships, National flag sales figures and so on. You have to be on this bus, else you are pretty close to being branded less patriotic than some others.

There are a lot of people who are coming out with their own version of the bill Mr Anna wants to push through. The government has one, the Team Anna has one, and some other intellectuals have come up with their suggestions. If he fasts any longer we may get drafts from the US as well.

I am just left with a question. What the hell is happening? I am not Anna. But my sentiments are surely with him. I support a strong bill against corruption.

But then, whatever is happening now is some sort of a circus. The trapezium stunt from Anna and team has every one enthralled, but there are some stiff competitions from people who are waiting to jump in. There are some government spokespersons who are hell bent up on doing the human cannon balls. I can’t make out if the sardar manager of this circus is speechless or plain mute. The owner of this circus, is not in town when its falling apart and her apparent heir is reading incoherent statements from a piece of paper in their arena. The background scores are from media – some sing for the owners, some for the performers.

I can bet a hundred that if our media reach and arrogance of free thought was to this level in 1947, somewhere an Arundhathi Roy could have written a blog and subverted the swaraj movements by mahatma.

Free India did not get the meaning of freedom too well I guess.

What could be a solution? I am with team Anna, and the strong bill. I don’t really care if this is the perfect bill. Perfecting this bill is a long process, let’s start with one. And personally the movement should start within. I have never paid a bribe. When I am caught by a traffic cop, I pay the fine and ask for a receipt. I am sure I would do the same even if it’s a land registration or starting my own business. If we can be sure of ourselves, we are in the movement to eradicate corruption at all level.

Revival

As far as blogging is concerned, I did fall asleep. Well, I guess b’lore weather was much more conducive for my vocal side of the brain. Or was it plain time management. Either way, I wanted to say hello….

Nothing inspired me to write now… neither did anything force me to stop earlier. So I guess its business as usual.

I am hoping this is a revival and it stays longer this time. I am gonna write and most importantly post it. Maybe long time from now, there might be ‘virtual archeologists’ and they may dig my blog and read ‘em… lemme etch something for them.

Digging for gold

I read a nice little story the other day… read on.

“Andrew Carnegie came to America from Scotland as a young boy. He started out by doing odd jobs and ended up as one of the largest steel manufacturers in United States. At one time, he had 43 millionaires working for him. A million dollars is a lot of money today, but in the 1920s it was worth much more.

Someone once asked Mr. Carnegie how he dealt with people. Andrew Carnegie replied, "Dealing with people is a lot like digging for gold: When you go digging for an ounce of gold you have to move tons of dirt. But when you go digging, you don't go looking for the dirt, you go looking for the gold."

Andrew Carnegie's reply has a very important message. Though sometimes it may not be apparent there is something positive in every person and every situation. We have to dig deep to look for the positive.”

Nice story. But does it work this way?

I am not a pessimist. But then, I think there are good people and then there are bad people. There are good times and there are times you are absolutely screwed. The positive is not sometimes in digging more and more, but just letting go.

Maybe there is no gold, let’s go dig some other place.

The Uninvited

Last few days have been a very different experience for me. One that has made me think of all the things I have missed out on life and all of that I never told anyone.

Death is inevitable for all of us. But as life passes by and you have lived your life, not just you, but some of your loved ones also expect death to be round the corner. Not that you want it to, but you just know it. Maybe we even prepare ourselves. The hard one to handle is the blind turn. When you least expect.

In my 30 yrs of life, I have not seen death this close. What it does and how it impacts. A son who suddenly feels he is not the boy of the house anymore. A daughter who tells me there was so much to tell her dad and he left without hearing anything. A wife who has not know a life without him in over 36 years.

Personally, for me it was a big loss, cos I could never ever express my gratitude to him. It used to be a celebration whenever I visited their house. And yet I used to avoid the visits, since I could not find time. I was in the same city a week ago and yet I avoided meeting him, thought to myself, next time I will make it up. I am heartbroken cos I know there is no next time now.

I wept when we took him through to the funeral. The bellowing smoke was burning our eyes, but none of us turned away for even a moment. And in some time, the about 6 foot tall uncle of mine was nothing at all…May his soul rest in peace.

Life has to move on. But one thought anchored in my mind is that, death often is uninvited, unexpected. And there are no second chances here. Keep your heart free and don’t have anything left to be told, done or experienced. Sound clichéd, I know. But it sounds a lot different when you say it while walking back from a funeral.

Grave Security Threat!

I am not one of those people who read every single news bit out of a news paper. But pictures, sports pages and certain words do grab my eyes. I happened to read a small column news on a grave security threat that is looming over our governmental offices.

“New Delhi: The Union home ministry, in a recent advisory to all officials, has warned government officials that watching porn at the workplace could pose a risk to the nation’s security. Sources said nearly 2 lakh hacking cases were being reported every day. Though the advisory does not specifically mention pornography, officials said porn surfing was common in various ministries. “Despite repeated warnings by the home ministry, officials of many vital wings of the government keep surfing pornographic sites during office hours using official computers, resulting in penetration of spyware from foreign hackers,’’ a ministry official said.”

They are advised to be cautious while doing so from now on. Pick and choose your porn source.

I like this circular. I mean its prob pretty tough on these guys. They are working very ‘hard’ and they also need to stretch out and enjoy their life a little. A very considerate circular.

I wonder if there was some annexure which spoke about safe sources and the one that could be avoided. Our intelligence services might have to be put on a high alert, just so that our govt officers are not going to unsafe porn sites. Its worth the effort, atleast we will not be hacked.

And you guessed it right; security threat is not the word that got my attention.

Eat Pray & Love

Just the other day, I was very strongly recommended to watch this movie. I am generally not a very cruel critic of any movie, and my comments are not directed only at this movie, but a very general observation.

Eat is Italy, pray is India and love is Bali. For those of you have not seen the movie. The shot where in Liz arrives in India is anything but deplorable. She is in a dingy rickety ambassador taxi, the driver is in full throttle with no sense of driving etiquettes, there are children on the street who are narrowly missed, there is a cow in the middle, a biker who almost knocks over. All this is familiar to us, of-course. But is that it?!

What’s itching me here is the shallow imagination of an American who probably is having a blind eye to any sort of developed canvas in a country like India. I will not fault him, he probably does not know where it is on the globe. When you look out from a well, often the world seems to be a lot smaller. And then you got to use your limited competence to imagine, how a world would be.

Let me go back to how Kolkata looked in the movie. I am not saying all this is not present in India. There are places which will resemble exactly like how they showed. But then, the scene depicts what India is through the below average screenplay. Italy – for ‘eat’ part of Liz’s journey was a treat to the eye. Why should the meaning of India be poverty? There was a lot of scope for the author / director – whoever was the one who decided the sequence to showcase a changing landscape. From the airport to the ashram. That would have been a lot more realistic.

Why I am voicing it out here is not cos I am craving for any acknowledgement from the western society on how India is changing. But as an Indian, I would urge people who are here to take photographs, make documentaries, make movies – open your eyes and tell the truth. India is spread across spectrums, be in nature, be it wealth. With over 24 Hollywood movies pending permission to be filmed in India, I hope someone is coming here for a more realistic setting and not an ego massage for the American public on how much ahead they are.

Since we are talking about the movie, it’s an absolute treat to the eye – the Italian landscape, the food and the Bali sceneries. It’s a treat to the eye as long as you can avoid looking at Julia.

The Grey Sky

I was driving back from my office through the express way. The horizon was looking extremely haunting. The sky was covered with heavy clouds. They were darkest shade of grey I have seen.

This overbearing sight was pretty close to how I was feeling right then. I quickly took a glance at the speed at which I was going. Brought it down to the speed
limits… its easy to float away and get lost in thoughts and not sense the speed.

The clouds looked too heavy for the sky to hold on to. They looked like clinging on to the last bit of strength they had…and did not want to leave the sky. I could see some cracks at the edges of this heavy curtain of grey. The bright sun trying to break through from underneath. But the cloud cover was quick to take notice and bring the grey across.

Is there no way I would see the sun before I cross the 10 km hassle free ride? For some reason, I was comparing and connecting what I saw to what I had in my mind. I had faced one pretty big disappointment at work. A debacle, which I had thought I had covered. It was haunting me, and keeping me negative, sad. I tried hard to come to terms with the facts and was trying hard to put my thoughts ahead of this. But pretty much in vain, just like the sun underneath, I thought.

And then it happened. It poured. It rained like the clouds were torn apart. It rained briefly, but heavily and it stopped. I could see that the great grey curtain was broken into patches. And the sun beams were gushing through them and giving a majestic sparkle to the steel railings of the highway.

I felt a lot lighter at that moment. As I joined the city roads from the highway, only one thought came to my mind. No grey cover can stay long. It’s only a matter of time and it’s in our hands to find a way to make it rain.

Blind Side

Yep, I did see the movie. But don’t go away; this is not a movie review. I am not that desperate, yet.

The movie won my heart in the first 60 seconds. It’s a very simple & straight forward expression. The blind side. It was described in such a wonderful way. The complete essence of the movie was sketched, with just that stroke.
I saw the movie. It overwhelmed me. And once I was done watching a thought struck me. We have our blind sides covered so well. In fact it’s done so well, that we don’t even know they exist.

The math paper tackled me to the ground when I was in the 12th grade. No no, that was not my blind side, I always knew that tackle was coming. The blind side was, not knowing what to do next. I was not going to be able to get into a good engineering college with a broken math score. I was in the sulk of my life time! My dad, he spoke to me once on the breakfast table. He spoke very little, but that changed the way I looked at myself. Engineering is not end of all. Go do a graduation. Choose your subject, which ever you like. My blind side was covered. I did not feel like a failure any more.

Most of the time, I miss appreciating what could have happened if it was not for that small advise. Yes, a small advice. It probably altered the course of my life and all it would ever be is a small advice. That right their e is a blind side covered. You will never know what could have happened but for that small step, a small piece of advice.

Only natural for you and I to miss many of our blind sides being covered.
We are always on the lookout for those tackles coming our way. We may be good at taking on tackles in life. But it’s the blind side that we need help on. Our family, our teachers, our friends, our colleagues all are out to cover our blind side. Appreciate it. Applaud it. Cherish it. And most importantly, mirror it.

PS: Watch Blind Side, if you have not already. Mind blowing!

A ‘Landmark’ Sale

Curious as it might sound, I attended a Landmark Forum Session few days back. I am sorry to say – it gave me the creeps.

If you are blinking at ‘Landmark Forum Session’ – It’s a personality development forum where in people come in and solve problems, cross hurdles which has been impeding them for years together. In the words of a rather loud trainer for the day – the forum helps you to realize the context of your life and also provides you with tool / technology (!) to deal with that context.

Why did I attend is the question that is ringing in your head right now. I met an angel couple of months back. I will jump in a well if she was to ask me to…this was one such well. You will get more meat to chew on this one…but not now.

I will give an insight into the session – in the shortest and most crisp manner possible. The landmark team had a bunch of people who had completed their course and were giving their feedbacks as to how they benefited with the course. And curious enough, a lot of them had regained their families. Really?! There was a man whom with my minimal knowledge I assessed to be proud, fixated with the concept and inflexible in mind. I assumed he was the trainer. Once the session of thanking and stories of transformation was done, they got on with real business.

The trainer started his marketing stunt. He offered guests to ask questions and provided insight about the program through the answers. Some questions were candid and like any experienced ‘talker’ some incoherent answers got him out of that muddle. After which the fee structure was announced and the time lines. Until this time I was really ok with the whole sales pitch that was made. To be fair to the trainer, he also mentioned that he is not doing it for charity. Its business.

At the end of this instance the trainer announced you can find volunteers sporting a yellow badge to help you, if you may want to register. I turned around to take a look. I could see volunteers flowing into the hall from different corners. They looked like a military unit surging on an unsuspecting senate for a coup. They had a mean look in their eyes, almost fixed at some predefined targets. One person had locked his eyes on me. And he moved swiftly towards me as if to pin me down before I could get up from my seat. At that moment, a seemingly peaceful session broke open into a chaos.

I dodged the guy, thanks to an old lady who got in his way and walked ever so slowly towards a registration counter. I avoided eye contact with everyone with a yellow badge and walked fast, as if I was going to pick something up. I told my thanks to the person who took me there and locked my eyes on the exit sign and dodged all yellow tagged ‘volunteers’ [who, I strongly feel are sales execs of Landmark].

As I stepped out of that hall, in my head, I could hear the commentators go, TOUCHDOWN!!! And I broke off into a dance!

Good Deed = No Bad Deed

Few days back, I returned to Bangalore from outside the city by bus. It was very early and as the bus eased into its stop, I could see auto drivers swarming up against the door to gobble up every passenger who got out. I have been doing this for years hence I did the customary ‘not looking in the eye’ trick and walked away. The guys who follow you are usually who can’t elbow their way to the front. They are usually milder.

I negotiated with one such ‘milder’ auto guy. He took some bizarre short cuts and we were zipping down the ‘Ring Road’ in no time. This road is usually deserted and at 4:30 on a wet morning, it looks like outer space. No life around. Suddenly I could not hear the auto engine anymore. He was fiddling with the throttle and then it all gave way and he parked it to one side. He got off and vanished behind the auto. A chill ran down my spine. I thought this could be the encounter of my life time.
Moments later many auto guys stopped by. I was pretty sure they are all wondering how to divide the loot. I was prepared for the attack and thought of even making the first move. The driver came up front and gave it another try and viola! It started. He explained to me that the darn rains had got his spark plug wonky.

I was still in my ‘ready to attack’ mode. Not realizing what a fool I was making of myself in my head. Slowly the auto driver was looking like a hero. He did not loot me! How many people do that?! He must be one gem of a person. A real good guy.

I dunno about you, but I seldom trust people today. It’s the stories you hear, the news that you read. There aren’t many good people around anymore. I am alert today, lest I fall into a trap that may have been laid by any random guy on the street. I assume most people have an intention to hurt me. I am not abnormal. I am just another average Indian citizen.

I am guessing, earlier it took a lot more to be seen as a good guy. A lot of ‘good deeds’. Today it’s a little easier. Just don’t do anything bad, you will be a hero.

Chaos – The key to Stability

Consciously or not, we strive for only one thing in life. Stability. We may project stability in one way or the other. For some it’s a job, for some its relationships, for some it’s a home, for some it’s a fat bank balance. Everyone has a definition for stability and I bet it’s different in each case.

The big questions are – How and when. How do we get there and when will we get there. For anything to become stable, it must first have its chaos phase. It’s the rule of the jungle, so to say. There is no stability without chaos. It’s imperative. As I said, stability might mean something entirely different for you and for me. But chaos almost always means – sweat, hard work, disappointment, failures, roadblocks, hurdles. It’s almost always problems.

I tend to take refuge when ever faced with problems. I blame someone – from time to parents, all have been prey to this blame game. I always find a way to shield myself from the problem. Until I figured the need to taste the flavor of this chaos. Meet it. Look it in the eye and walk your way through it. The chaos will allow you to flip every stone around and give you a million perspectives. You will solve your chaos. But the moment one hides behind the shield of a blame that you created, you have lost sight of the chaos itself.

The key to achieving stability is to accept the chaos and moving forward. I am dealing with one such chaos in my life right now. I was scared to face it. Now I am staring it in the eye and I am walking through my chaos.

Cut those nails, kill that itch

Have you ever wondered why you don’t feel that itch on your head right after cutting your nails?

I have, not since it’s intellectually stimulating, but there are some itches that I want to get rid of. The moment you cut your nails short, the itch at the back of your head seems to vanish. I am guessing the brain tells the itch – no point, he can’t scratch anyway. I ‘m not gonna ask him to scratch.

But this might as well be true. For sure, I stop scratching my head the moment I cut my nails.

There are other types of itches that we so dearly want to get rid of. My Everest, Spending. I just can’t seem to stop spending. This itch is scratching my wallet dry. I sure want to get rid of this one. Maybe I should cut the nail out for this itch as well… lock my credit card in some shelf.

Every itch in our life has a nail that can be cut. Cut those nails, kill that itch.

Being a HiPo

There is a new species, discovered recently. The HiPos. And before you judge me, of course I don’t watch animal planet – HiPo is a short form of High Potential. Every organization is having one program or the other to appease and provide a ‘fast track’ career path to these HiPos. The name actually cracks me up...I wonder if all ‘HiPos’ are fat and sweat pink.

Since this is a new species, just like our confused high school teachers, the managers of today also work well with their imaginative self. There are a lot of assumptions and myths about a HiPo. Since I am also occasionally ‘accused’ of being a HiPo where I work, let me try and throw some light around that corner…

The only thing in a HiPos mind is work: Sometimes managers mistake passion for obsession. If you show passion at work, the manager feels that you are obsessed with work and hence give more work…anyway he loves working, give him this one as well! Loading a person just makes him tired and it does not make him unearth super human powers.

HiPos hate their families: Many managers believe and the rest hope and pray that their high performing employee hates his family. He loves to come to office early and leave as late as possible. If there is no family even better. They believe it helps in keeping focus on work, distractions can affect the work. How prudent!

Anything goes: Managers feel that a HiPo is like a recycle bin. You can throw anything at them at all, and be rest assured that they will do it. More often than not, HiPos are asked to take up things that smarter non-HiPos are not willing to take up. Content of the work does not matter. Since they are obsessed with work anyway…

The myth of fast track career: This myth has been working since long. They say, you are on a fast track career and hence, wait for another 6 months to get the ‘right’ overseas opportunity. And don’t look at the average performing guy, who is already gone overseas twice, as an example. He is in a first come first serve basis. So much for being in the limelight!

HiPos are loyal and hence they won’t leave: Managers like to believe that a HiPo is so loyal to the company that he will never think of leaving. Hence treat them well, would have been a very logical conclusion. But hold on, it also gives a chance to take them for granted. This is surely more fun from the looks of it.

Here’s a thought, maybe it’s not worth trying so very hard. Being a HiPo in one organization is no great achievement. Be a HiPo at home. That is much more gratifying and rewarding than any company can ever offer.

Someone once said, ‘One day, it would be hard to believe that a man of Mahatam’s stature and nature walked this ground. And then he would be a god’.

Kashmir. Bhopal. Mumbai. Manipur. Naxals,Dirty Cops. Dirtier Politicians.

I am a patriot. I love my country. I am proud that my grandfather was one amongst the thousands who sacrificed a good part of their lives to gain this freedom. But I am inclined to think today, there is something wrong with us.

Look around. We have issues with Pakistan, China, Srilanka, Bangaladesh, Nepal. That’s our neighbors. When you think of it, we are not in good terms with any of our neighbors. If I am not in good terms with any of my neighbors, then definitely I am doing something wrong. When I sit down to watch news every night, this feeling deepens.

The only thing that I thought was strong in our country was the judicial system. Latest can of worms makes you think otherwise. Everyone seems to be on the wrong side. Or is it that I have missed the plot somewhere?

In China, a large section of people believe that India is a not a country but a conglomeration of countries. They strongly believe in liberating a few as well. If we run down the lane a little, it sounds bang on. 63 years back, some of our leaders worked hard on making this one country. Today, sadly, we have not been able to sustain.

We are being encroached with ease around the borders. I used to wonder why this was so simple. They were claiming and we were complying. The reason, I think is because, ‘India’ is not one thought. It’s a different thought for a person from Mumbai to one in Chennai. It means a lot different when a Kashmiri says India, and when you go into the villages of the ‘red corridor’ it takes a different meaning all together.

Years back, one old man was able to make us all think in one direction, bring us all together. We followed him, and he led us to freedom. No matter what language, color or religion, when he said India, it only meant one thing – our country.

Maybe he was different.
Maybe he was gifted.
Maybe he was God.

Comfortably Numb

Every afternoon after lunch, at work, I take a stroll through the campus. A 5 minute stroll which is very pleasant given the kind of campus I work out of. Once, I noticed there were a bunch of guys who were standing in the shade and having a casual discussion and seemed to be enjoying it. As I got closer I could see, one of them dished out a handful of mint candies and handed one over to each of them. All of them in a swift move opened the wrapper and threw the candy into their mouth and in a follow-through; with precision of a Federrer back-hand dumped the wrapper into the lawn. These were well educated, over-paid executives who just did that. And this, when there are dustbins all around the campus!

But I did nothing. I walked past them and came back to my desk. I do that often when I come to think of it. I walk away from what seemingly is wrong, small or big. I just get along with my life. Roads are messy, politicians are crooks, office is political, busses are rickety, drivers are arrogant, prices are rising, drains are clogged, hotter days, traffic is slower, shop keepers are ruder, bomb blasts are a routine… and still my life just goes on. The plane crashed, a bomb blast took a train apart, a full family dies on the way to meet an ailing relative, a seasoned driver and a very charitable & helpful person dies of a small mistake – took his seat belt off while on a highway… I am still in status quo.

I feel the pain when I hear all this… from a wrapper shot into the lawn to the state of mind of a 4 yr old boy who has lost every one from his family in one shot. I feel scared. I feel worried, thinking life could be so short. But the strangest thing is, I feel numb.

I feel numb, and a song comes back to me time and again…

The child is grown.
The dream is gone.
And I have become,
Comfortably Numb

1828 Days

1828 Days. That’s how long I have been - Associate # 157725.

I saw a cartoon which speaks about Brussels sprouts in a burger. They are too big to be counted with junior peas and too small to be around the senior cabbages. That’s exactly how I feel right now.

Strange that the cartoonist chose peas & cabbages. I always hated both.

As I said, it’s been 1828 days since I have been Associate # 157725. That’s all it means in an office. It can easily be replaced or substituted. The individual, never really gets to come out in the realm. I am at a cross road right now. Should I continue to be a number in a huge list, or find my own identity?

I don’t have an answer. If you find one, lemme know.

The Political Soap

I was a little saddened with the IPL drawing to a close…it was a routine for me. Getting back from office, landing directly on the bean bag and watching which ever match was being played… it did not matter who was playing whom. And like all good things it had to come to an end. Left a huge void in the 8 to 1130 PM slot…What do I do when I get back home?

I am not particularly a fan of Soaps… the saas bahu types. But I chanced upon the Political Soaps that run in the news channels nowadays. The twists and plots that they brew up is absolutely original and gives you a rush most often than not. Every week our news channels diligently take issues and blow the hell out of its proportions. Then there is this ‘tamasha’ they call debate. One of the main news readers would take the lead and shoot seemingly uncomfortable questions. This, interestingly, will be very comfortably fended off by ‘spoke persons’ from different political circus troops.

I am not politically inclined…probably a little inclined away. Nor does any of the politicians of today inspire me. You must be wondering why on earth did I stop at a news channel while zooming away towards VH1. To be frank, some of the news readers are very good looking, the women that is. And I mean it in a very good way. Yeah, you got my point…

A typical evening show begins with the news reader picking out, an unnoticed incident otherwise, and placing it in front of us. He invites people who are I think paid for these visits, and initiates the debate. Another intriguing aspect is the audience poll on these issues. They read out the results at the end of the show and there are people, who have actually sent in the SMS, I would like to meet one of them. Some have live tweeting during the program too…just in case you wanted to speak your mind!

I am not politically inclined. And I don’t know if any of those debates makes any sense. The guys who hurl at each other, all the filth they can lay their hands on, don’t have any commitment to the topic of their own. They are spokes persons. The wag the way they have been asked to. Another interesting aspect to these soaps is that, you don’t have to put up with ‘elastic’ scripts which are stretched across several weeks. The issues that are picked up are not debated for more than a week, to keep the interest levels high, I suppose. A lesson for the less evolved Soap directors. May be they should get some news houses to do their scripts.

I think a disclaimer is valid here…I am not rubbishing all the politicians and all of news readers. But the incompetent ones out-number the good ones by a huge margin that even the law of averages at times is a failure here…

Again, I am not politically inclined. I watch it for the sheer fun. Have some fun listening to the debate. The victory of ruling government over opposition on some day and the other way around the next. Get some sleep after that, while the news house finishes the payments for their performances…and set out looking for a new ‘real’ issue